The Pyro Horror Picture Show
by PyroKittie
Summary: Jump to the left, step to the right, and read my crossover parody of the Rocky Horror Picture Show! ch. 4 up! PG-13 for things that will come later.
1. Chapter 1

The Pyro Horror Picture Show By Pyro Kittie  
  
Disclaimer: I, P.K., do not in any way own the characters that I'm using in this story. Well, ok, I own Hope Marquis, but that's it. All other characters belong to the people that created them. Who the creators are I cannot say; I do not exactly know who's playing who yet, and if I did I don't know all of the creators as different characters from different shows will appear. Ok, that's a lie too. I know that Sakura Kittie owns Brene, so I can say that. Other than that, though, don't ask 'cause I don't know. Also, I feel it important to stress that "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" is not my creation either. There is no way I could pull of something that great. Even if I could, I'm sure Tim Curry and Meat Loaf and everyone else would sue me if I said "Rocky Horror" was mine, so it's in my best interest- and the interest of these great personalities- for me to disclaim it. Sorry for the length of this. I'll get to the summary now. ARIGATOU!  
  
Summary: Well, we all know the story of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and that's almost exactly what this is, but with a few changes. Note: any word between two asterisks is an action. Remember how I said I don't own the characters in here? Well I don't. I am using anime characters in place of the "Rocky Horror" characters. The changes are as follows:  
  
Taking Frank N. Furter's role is . . . . NURIKO! Taking Brad Majors' role is . . . . . CYE! Taking Janet Weiss' role is . . . . . HOPE MARQUIS! Taking Riff Raff's role is . . . . . . TOMO! Taking Magenta's role is . . . . . . BRENE! Taking Columbia's role is . . . . . MIHOSHI! Taking Rocky's role is . . . . . . QUATRE! Taking Eddie's role is . . . . . . . TASUKI! Taking Dr. Everett Scott's role is . . . KOJI! And taking the role of the narrator is . . ME!!!! (Figures, huh?)  
  
Well, that's about it. Oh! I forgot to mention one thing: I had to switch a few of the lyrics in a couple of songs to fit this story. Those songs that needed editing will be written out so you can see what I changed. Enjoy the fic minna!  
  
Chapter One  
  
* "Science Fiction/ Double Feature" Plays *  
  
I would like, if you will allow me, to take you on a really weird trip; a trip full of love . passion . and . CROSSDRESSERS?! Hmmm . this should be interesting. Let's get started. Our story begins at a local high school - probably not unlike yours, or, for you graduates, the one you went to. Hope Marquis and her boyfriend Cye are standing outside talking. It looks like Cye has something on his mind. Wonder what it is? Let's listen in and find out. "Hey, Hopie?" "Yes Cye?" "I have something to say." "Uh huh?" "I really love the . way you pass . all the quizzes and tests . in our English class." "Oh . oh, Cye ." All of a sudden, Cye erupts into a song: (To the tune of "Dammit Janet") "The football games are a big joke-y (Hopie)/ The coaches are soon gonna croak-y (Hopie)/ I go to ask you to elope-y (Hopie)/But I don't and I feel like a dopie, but Hopie, I love you/ I don't get equations and slope-y (Hopie)/ You are my life-saving rope-y (Hopie)/ Without you in my life I can't cope-y (Hopie)/ I may be a chestnut-haired dopie, but Hopie, I love you/ Do you now believe that I'm no joker?/ I just want our love to grow/ Times may be bad or mediocre/ But H-O-P-I-E, I love you so!" At this, Hope begins to sing right back: "It's a bad song, but you gave it a nice try (Oh Cye)/ Right now I feel like a could fly (Oh Cye)/ But don't sing any more or I may cry (Oh Cye)/ I'll tell you this now and that's Cye, I'd die for you too." At this point, the two begin to sing together: "[Hope] Ohhh, Cye ./ [Cye] Ohhh . dopie/ [Hope] I'd die/ [Cye] Oh . Hopie/ [Hope] For you/ [Cye]I love you too/ [Both] There's one thing left to do, ah- oooh ./ [Cye] And that's go to the snow and ski slope-y (Hopie)/ Where I saw you and tried hard to grope-y (Hopie)/ I asked you and got a huge nope-y (Hopie)/ I said I was a bunny- slope dopie, but Hopie, I loved you/ I'm a dopie, but Hopie/ Oh Cye, I'd die/ I'm a dopie, but Hopie/ [Both] I love . you."  
  
After this . er . interlude, the two run to Cye's car, their minds set on returning to the mountain where they met. But that's not what happens. After a couple of hours of driving, Cye notices that it's beginning to rain. "Aw, man . oh well. At least we're safe here in the car." Then, as if on cue, the car sputters and slows to a stop. "You just had to say that, didn't you?" "It's not my fault. But we have to find a phone somewhere so we can call a mechanic to fix the car." "OK. But where are we supposed to find a phone in the middle of nowhere?" "I don't know. Maybe if we walk awhile we can find a phone." "Walk outside in the rain? You must be kidding." "Oh, come on." And so, our story begins to get a bit interesting as the two are now stranded in the rain. Wonder if they'll find a phone to call a mechanic? Let's continue our little peek into the lives of Hope and Cye. "Cye, let's stop, huh? We've been walking for half an hour, we haven't found a phone, and I'm soaked." "Hey, what's that?" "It's . a light! Cye, it's a light!" "Great! Come, on, let's go!!!!!" As they walk, the two begin to sing. * "Over at the Frankenstein Place" plays * A little while later, the two arrive at a huge, freakish-looking house. "Well, we're here." "Mmm-hmm. Er . you knock." And so, with a shaking hand, Cye knocks on the door. Little does he know what lies behind that door for them. 


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note: Hi again. Just wanted to relay the information that the lyrics to "The Time Warp" and "Sweet Transvestite" will appear in this chapter, even though I don't need to rewrite them. Why? Simple: because I like "The Time Warp", and I find it hilarious to imagine Nuriko singing "Sweet Transvestite". And I also wanted to answer the question of one of my readers (I forget the name): No, the Koji in my story is not from Transformers. He is Tasuki's best friend. I chose him because I needed someone who cared about Tasuki, much as Dr. Everett Scott cared for Eddie in "Rocky Horror". I came out with Koji. Well, that's about it for now. Ja ne!  
  
  
  
Chapter Two  
  
Oh! You're back. Okay then, let's continue .  
  
As Cye finishes knocking on the door, it slowly - very slowly - opens. Behind it is a weird-looking guy wearing makeup. He searches with his eyes for the person who knocked on the door, finding Hope and Cye. Looking the two over, he notices they are dripping wet. "Oh. You're soaked. You better come inside until the rain stops." He opens the door a little wider to allow the couple in. They look at each other with apprehension, but enter anyway. "It's nice of you to invite us into your home like this," Cye says to their host. "MY home? Don't make me laugh. I just live here. You may address me as Tomo. If you'll wait a second, I'll introduce you to my sister, Brene." Before the couple can protest, Tomo goes off into the next room to retrieve his sister. A few seconds later they hear protesting from what sounds like a female. "Let go of me you fruity fairy! I said I didn't want to leave my room!! Something very interesting was happening on my monitor and I want to see what's going on!" Tomo's voice is heard next. "You can watch that stupid thing any time. I said you were going to meet our guests. They're expecting you." At this, Tomo reappears with a blonde female. "This is Brene." The two smile and politely introduce themselves, noticing the scarcity of clothes on the young blonde's part. "Yeah, yeah. Hi. Can I go now?" Tomo shakes his head disappointedly. "Your behavior is astounding." "Astounding, O brother dear?" The two siblings exchange an evil grin, as if they can read each other's minds. A couple of seconds later, Tomo and Brene break into song: ("The Time Warp") (A/N: Words between the two ~'s are always the chorus.) "[Tomo] It's astounding/ Time is fleeting/ Madness takes its toll/ But listen closely/ [Brene] Not for very much longer/ [Tomo] I've got to . keep control/ I remember/ Doing the Time Warp/ Drinking/ Those moments when/ The blackness would hit me/ [Together] And the void would be calling . / LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!/ LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!/ ~ [Tomo] It's just a jump to the left/ [All] And then a step to the ri-i-i-i-ight/ [Tomo] Put your hands on your hips/ [All] And then your knees get ti-ight/ Then it's the pelvic thru-ust/ And then it drives you insa-a-a-a-ane/ LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!/ LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!~/ [Brene] It's so dreamy/ O fantasy free me!/ So you can't see me/ No, not at all/ In another dimension/ With voyeuristic intentions/ Well-secluded, I see all/ [Tomo] With a bit of a mind-flip/ [Brene] You're into the time slip/ [Tomo] And nothing/ Can ever be the same/ [Brene] You're spaced out on sensation/ [Tomo] Like you're under sedation!/ [All] LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!/ LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!" Just then, another blonde female enters the room. She, too, begins to sing: " [Mihoshi] Well I was walking down the street, just-a having a think, when a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink!/ He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise, he had a pickup truck and the devil's eyes/ He stared at me and I felt a change/ Time meant nothing, never would again!/ [All] LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!/ LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!/ ~Chorus~ "  
  
When the group is finished singing, they notice that their guests have horrified looks on their faces. Tomo is the first to speak. "Oh. Sorry. This is Mihoshi. She's my sister's roommate." Cye gives himself a mental shake and extends his hand toward the indicated female. "Charmed, I'm sure. My name is Cye, and this is my girlfriend Hope." Mihoshi nods, smiles, releases Cye's hand, and exits. "Er . nice people you got here." "Oh, don't worry. You haven't yet met them all." Tomo gives a little chuckle. "My master is busy at the moment, and you can never tell when he'll be finished with one of his stupid projects. My suggestion for you would be to relax until he comes downstairs." Cye and Hope both shake their heads adamantly. "That's quite okay. We'll just stand here and wait for . er . your master." All of a sudden, they hear a door upstairs slam. This seems to interest Tomo. "Heh. Speak of the devil." "NANI?!" "Calm down, er . Hope, is it? That was my master's laboratory door. He should be down soon." At this, a gorgeous-looking male wearing a very short dress enters the hall via an elevator. "My good guests, this is my master, Nuriko." The one Tomo calls Nuriko nods and, unexpectedly to his three companions, starts singing as he walks into the room: ("Sweet Transvestite") "How d'you do, I/ See you've met my/ Faithful handyman/ He's just a little brought down because/ When you knocked/ He thought you were the candy man/ Don't get strung up/ By the way I look/ Don't judge a book by its cover/ I'm not/ Much of a man/ By the light of day/ But by night I'm one hell of a lover/ ~I'm just a sweet transvestite/ From Transsexual, Transylvania!~/ Let me/ Show you around, maybe/ Play you a sound/ You look like you're both pretty groovy/ Or if you want something visual that's not/ Too abysmal/ We can take in an old Steve Reeves movie." Cye interrupts him at this point, as does Hope: "[Cye] I'm glad we caught you at home. Could we use your phone? We're both in a bit of a hurry." "[Hope] Right!" "[Cye] We'll just stay where we are then go back to the car. We don't want to be any worry." Following this, Nuriko picks up where he was: "Well you got/ Caught with a flat, well/ How 'bout that?/ Well babies, don't you panic/ By the light of the night/ It'll all seem alright/ I'll get you a satanic mechanic/ ~Chorus~/ Why don't you . stay for the night?/ Or maybe . a bite?/ I could show you my favorite . obsession/ I've been . making a man/ With blonde hair and a tan/ And he's good for relieving my . tension/ ~Chorus 2x~/ So come up to the lab/ And see what's on the slab/ I see you shiver with antici . pation/ But maybe the rain/ Isn't really to blame/ So I'll remove the cause/ But NOT the SYMPTOM!"  
  
Cye and Hope just stare at Nuriko as he finishes his song, not knowing what to make of the strange 'man'. He senses their hostility and smiles. "Hmm. You two are drenched. Oh well, no worries. BRENE!" The blonde sticks her head in the room. "Nani yo, master?" "Help our guests. Get them out of the wet clothes they're wearing." Brene nods and pulls Hope toward her. "Come on." The two disappear into Brene's room for all of about two seconds and Hope exits, wearing little more than her skin. The same is true for Cye (although with guys it's a bit more acceptable). "There you go. Now don't disturb me!" Brene slams her door and that's all she says for the time being. Nuriko looks at his guests. "Well, let me give you the tour. We'll start up in the lab." He closes the door of the elevator, apparently assuming that the two and Tomo will follow. When they enter the so-called "lab", their sight falls upon a frightened- looking blonde male. "Everyone, this is Quatre, my creation and my pride and joy." Hope and Cye exchange a glance; clearly questioning what Nuriko means exactly by the words 'my creation'. The boy called Quatre smiles weakly and then sits down, undoubtedly wondering who these people are. Nuriko smiles lovingly at Quatre and then (shock!) begins to sing to him:  
  
* "I Can Make You a Man" plays *  
  
When Nuriko is done singing he looks at Quatre, expecting him to be happy about the song. What he sees is that his 'creation' is a bit confused over the whole thing. "Er . uh, why don't we all go downstairs? It's a lot more interesting there than it is here." Not having any better ideas, the rest of the group decides to follow. After they are all downstairs and accounted for, Nuriko begins explaining the weird things that are seen around the place. All of a sudden, he is interrupted by the sound of a rapidly approaching motorcycle. 


	3. Chapter 3

Author's note: Konichiwa minna! As you can see, I have decided to do a little a/n before every chapter. I don't have much to say in this one, other than the fact that I have dragged a special guest here to join me. Everyone, please give a round of sound for . NAKAGO!!! Yes, I have persuaded the oh-so-good-at-being-evil shogun to join me for the last few chapters.  
  
[Nakago] Persuaded, my ass! She dragged me here! HELP!!!  
  
[P.K.] It does what it's told!  
  
[Nakago] Ano . remind me to throw out your copy of Joe Dirt, ne?  
  
[P.K.] Aw, shut up before I go get Soi.  
  
[Nakago] KYADDA! Ok, ok, I'll be good!  
  
[P.K.] That's what I thought. Well, ja matta ne minna. Oh, btw, the words to "Hot Patootie ~ Bless My Soul" and "Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me" will be in the chapter cause I want them there.  
  
[Nakago] HELP ME, ONEGAI!  
  
[P.K.] Grr . while I tend to Nakago, you enjoy the chapter. Ja ne minna- san!  
  
Chapter Three  
  
You again, huh? All right, I suppose I can keep going .  
  
"Tasuki!!!" The motorcycle crashes through the wall and Mihoshi runs over to the redhead with a saxophone strapped to his back that's seated on it. He doesn't say anything, just gets of his "bike", tosses off his helmet, and looks around for a second or two. Then he opens his mouth, but instead of speaking, he's singing:  
  
("Hot Patootie ~ Bless My Soul") "Whatever happened to Saturday ni-ight?/ When you dressed up sharp and ya felt all right/ It don't seem the same since cosmic light/ Came into my life, I thought I was div-i-ine/ I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go/ And listen to the music on the radio/ A saxophone was blowin' on a rock- and-roll show/ We climbed in the back seat, really had a good ti-ime/ ~ Hot Patootie, bless my soul/ Really love that rock-and-roll/ Repeat 3x~/ *Tasuki saxophone solo* / My head used to swim from the perfume I smelled/ My hands kinda fumbled with her white plastic belt/ I'd taste her baby-pink lipstick and that's when I'd melt/ She'd whisper in my ear tonight she really was mi-ine/ Get back in front and put some hair oil on/ Buddy Holly was singin' his very last song/ With your arms around your girl you try to sing along/ It felt pretty good -- whoo! -- really had a good ti-i-ime/ ~Chorus~/ *Tasuki saxophone solo*/ ~Hot Patootie, bless my soul/ Really love that rock-and-roll/ Repeat"  
  
At this point, Nuriko begins to chase Tasuki around the room (or basement, whichever you prefer) with an axe. (Surprisingly, the background people keep singing. Why? Don't ask.) They run through the hole that Tasuki made with his motorcycle. After the end of the song, Nuriko re-enters the room carrying the axe, which is covered in blood. Tasuki does not follow him. "AHHHHH! TASUKI!!!" Mihoshi runs over to the hole in the wall but is stopped by Nuriko before she can go through it. "You know there's no use going through there. You know what's on the other side of this hole." Mihoshi backs away from Nuriko. "You ASSHOLE!! I can't believe you would do that to Tasuki!" She turns and runs up the stairs to her room. Nuriko looks over at Quatre, who seems rather disturbed by the whole thing. "Don't look so sad. It was a mercy killing. I didn't have a choice. It had to be done." Quatre just shakes his head, refusing to believe it. Nuriko doesn't notice and continues talking. "Besides, what with that temper of his I could never really work up a love for him. He didn't have much to offer me." Quatre then flexes an arm, which makes Nuriko's jaw drop to the floor. "Like I said, he never interested me ."  
  
* Nuriko sings "I Can Make You A Man (reprise)"*  
  
When Nuriko's vocal part of the song is over, an electric guitar version of the Wedding March is heard. Nuriko and Quatre link arms and begin ascending a set of stairs leading to a bed. Sheer curtains are closed, and the rest of the occupants of the castle clear out of the room. Minutes later, Hope and Cye are (literally) pushed into separate rooms. Hope is extremely miffed. "Baka no minna. Why am I being shoved in here alone? This place is so freaking creepy . Cye ." Deciding to just sleep until she and Cye can get in their car and leave, she lies down on the bed and stares at the ceiling. A few minutes later, Hope's door is opened and a voice emits from the silence. "Hopie?" "Cye! Oh, I'm so glad you're here! These people are freaking me out . come in and stay with me for awhile?" "Okay." The figure crosses the room and gets into Hope's bed with her. After a second or two, they begin kissing. The person who is apparently Cye is sitting between Hope's legs. "Cye . God I love you ." A voice answers, but it's not Cye's: "Really? I rather like you, too." Hope gasps. "YOU!" The figure pulls off a wig, revealing the ever-present Nuriko. "Yeah, I know. Ain't it great?" "Yeah right! What have you done with Cye?!" "Absolutely nothing. Why? You got a suggestion?" "CYE!!!!!!!!!" Nuriko shakes his head. "I wouldn't do that. He's probably sleeping. It'd be kind of a shock for him to wake up and find you this way, wouldn't it?" With that, he pulls her legs up to his midsection. "What way? Cye is very trusting. He knows I would never . have never." After a few minutes of silence, Hope sighs. "You swear Cye won't know?"  
  
A few minutes later, there is a knock on Cye's door. A feminine voice is heard. "Cye?" "Hope! You're probably freaked, aren't you? Why don't you come in for awhile?" "Don't mind if I do." 'Hope' crosses the room and gets in the bed. 'She' sits between Cye's legs and they start to kiss. "You know how much I love you, right?" It is not Hope who answers: "Really? You're not so bad yourself." Cye screams like a girl. "YOU!" Nuriko has fooled Cye, too. He pulls off the wig he was wearing. "Yep! Ain't it cool?" "No it's not cool! What'd you do with Hope?!" "Not a thing. Why? Can you give me a few suggestions?" "HOPIE!!!" Nuriko puts his hand over Cye's mouth. "You sure you wanna do that? Hope's sleeping by now. Wouldn't want her to wake up and see you like this, would you?" "Like what? Hope knows I'd never . never ." Nuriko smirks at Cye's inability to finish his sentence. As he leans over to kiss Cye, Tomo's face appears on a monitor across the room. "Your creation has escaped the lab, master. The dogs are chasing him around the premises as we speak." Nuriko sighs unhappily. "Take care of it! I'll speak to you later about this; you can count on it." "Hai, master." With that, Tomo's face is gone from the screen. "Now, Cye, where were we?" Cye still looks apprehensive about the idea, but responds: "You won't tell Hope?"  
  
A few minutes later, Hope is seen walking around the castle. "They can't keep me in that dratted room forever. And since it doesn't seem like we're leaving any time soon, I better get a feel for this place." She pokes her head into a room, and, seeing it empty, walks inside. "Hmm . hey! I remember this place! It's that freaky lab Nuriko brought us to. Looks like there's an upstairs. Wonder what he's got there?" After ascending a spiral staircase, she wanders until her eyes fall upon a monitor. It is on, and currently has a view of what's going on in Cye's room. What she sees makes her jaw drop to the floor. Cye is sitting upright in his bed, panting. Lying down behind him is a grinning Nuriko. "Oh my god. Cye, how could you? ." She slides to the floor and begins to cry. "I can't believe he would ever do that to me! I though we were in love . guess I was wrong ." Just then, a slobbery and bloody Quatre enters, very out of breath. Hope stands up and Quatre stumbles toward her. "What happened? You're hurt pretty badly. Here, let me take care of it for you." She rips a piece of the black slip she is wearing and begins to dress his wounds. "I don't know what did this to you, but whatever it was did a good job of it." As she is wrapping another strip of the black silk around one of his wrists, Quatre looks at Hope and smiles. She returns the smile, taking a small pause in her task. After tying the last bit of slip to one of his wounds, she casts a glance over at the monitor. It is off, but that makes no difference to Hope. She sets a determined look upon her face and turns back to Quatre. Little do these two know that two other pairs of eyes are watching their every move: Mihoshi and Brene have tuned in on their own private monitor from the room they share. They share a smirk as Mihoshi, who is wearing a pair of bunny ears, looks up from painting her nails. (A/N: Yes, I replaced the mouse ears on purpose. FUH-Q EISNER!!!!!!!!!! Heh heh . gomen, minna. Back to the fic.) "Tell us about it, Hope."  
  
("Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me") "I was feelin' done in/ Couldn't win/ I'd only ever kissed be-fo-o-ore/ [Mihoshi] You mean she .? [Brene] Uh-huh. / [Hope] I thought there's no use getting/ Into heavy petting/ It only leads to trouble and . seat wetting/ Now all I want to know/ Is how to go-o-o/ I've tasted blood and I want more/ [Brene and Mihoshi] More, more, more! / [Hope] I'll put up no resistance/ I want to stay the distance/ I've got an itch to scratch/ I need assistance/ ~Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me/ I wanna be di-irty/ Chill me, thrill me, fulfill me/ Creature of the night ~/ Then if anything grows *giggle*/ While you pose/ I'll oil you up and rub you down/ [Brene and Mihoshi] Down, down, down! / [Hope] And that's just one small fraction/ Of the main attraction/ You need a friendly ha-and/ And I need action/ ~Chorus~/ [Mihoshi] *making fun of Hope and Quatre* Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me/ [Brene] *playing along* I wanna be dirty/ [Mihoshi] Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me/ [Brene] Creature of the night/ [Hope] ~Chorus~/ [Quatre] Creature of the night/ [Cye's voice] Creature of the night? / [Nuriko's voice] Creature of the night/ [Brene's voice] Creature of the night/ [Tomo's voice] Creature of the night/ [Mihoshi's voice] Creature of the night/ [Quatre] Creature of the night/ [Hope] Creature of the night."  
  
A few seconds later, Nuriko, Cye, and Tomo are seen in the elevator. Nuriko is proceeding to tie Tomo up with a shiny red ribbon. When the elevator stops, Tomo falls out, yelling "Mercy!" Nuriko starts laughing, and then just looks at Tomo, a grin plastered on his face. "Master Nuriko, I beseech you, do forgive me. It isn't my fault Quatre has gone missing." "Aw, shut up you fairy. Now go look for him on the monitor before I get mad at you." Nuriko unties Tomo and pushes him toward the indicated screen. Obviously Quatre isn't there. But they do see a figure. Cye does a double take and then exclaims: "Hey, I know that guy! It's ."  
  
* * * *  
  
Author's note: Ha ha ha ha ha!!! A cliffhanger! I bet you're all wondering who the new character is. Well, I'm not telling. Why? Cause if you have paid any attention at all to the movie (or seen it for that matter), you should know who they see on the monitor. If you can't guess, then simply go back to chapter one and look over which characters are in the story thus far. Well, that's about it from here.  
  
[Nakago] No it's not! I'm tied in a chair! HELP ME, ONEGAI!!!  
  
[P.K.] Aw, shut up. Hmm . do you guys think I should untie him? Let me know yes or no IN A REVIEW. If I get more reviews that say no rather than yes, or don't get any reviews at all, Nakago will stay tied in the chair. If I have more saying yes, then I'll release him.  
  
[Nakago] REVIEW THE FIC, ONEGAI! MY . er . MOBILITY (yeah that's it!) IS AT STAKE!  
  
[P.K.] Well, ja ne minna. You'll find out Nakago's fate in chapter four.  
  
[Nakago] I don't like the sound of that . 


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: *shakes head in disappointment* Minna, I thought you were a lot more loyal than what I have seen. I have only gotten TWO REVIEWS since my last post, which was a considerable time ago. This shows me that you don't really care about the fic, or the fate of poor Nakago. I have waited patiently since that post with this chapter; it has been ready for posting since then. And what do I get? TWO REVIEWS. Now, don't get me wrong, I am extremely appreciative of them (arigatou, Ayeaka and Reily!) but I still have no responses on my Nakago situation (untie vs. leave tied in chair). So I have to resort to drastic measures. Minna, I need reviews to let me know how I'm doing on the fic. And if you guys can't supply them, well, then I'll have to remove the fic and myself from the site. So I'll leave this posted for a period of one month. If I have no more reviews by then, PyroKittie and all of the great fics I have in the works will no longer be on FF.net, and PyroKittie as a person may cease to exist. I'm leaving it up to you. You want fics? Tell me so in a review. No reviews = no PK = no fics for you. And Nakago will remain forever tied in that chair. [Nakago] REVIEW THE FICS, MINNA, PLEASE! I NEED OUT OF HERE!!! [P.K.] You heard him You want fics? You want him out of the chair? I want reviews. I get what I need, you get what you need. Remember: one month. Til then. - a downcast PyroKittie  
  
Chapter Four  
  
Well, you've returned. Glad to see you made it. Let's get going, then .  
  
" . Koji." At the mention of this, Nuriko cracks the ribbon like a whip. Taking the hint that his master is angry, Tomo asks Cye: "You know this guy? This . earth-creature?" "Yes. He was the one who introduced me to Hope." Nuriko then turns to Cye, a really ticked off look on his face. "Ah. Then you didn't arrive here on accident." "No! My car broke down, I told you that. I'm not known to lie." "Yeah right. I'm so sure." "He was a friend of mine at the time." "And now he works in Washington, for the FBI. He is assigned to checking the country for the things you people call UFOs!" Tomo taps Nuriko on the shoulder. "Er . master? The intruder is entering the building." "He'll probably be in . in the shrine!"  
  
We cut, for a brief moment, to a beautiful, golden shrine with a glittery ruby statue of a phoenix. The blue-haired bandit that had been spoken of is looking up at with awe. "Cool! I can imagine how much I could sell that thing for."  
  
Now we go back to Nuriko's lab, where he is smirking at Cye. "Why don't we just ask him himself why he's here?" He then pulls a lever marked 'SuzaKoaster'. In the shrine, a metallic gold roller coaster seat with a red phoenix painted on it appears right under Koji. Nuriko's pre-recorded voice is heard, saying, "Keep your hands and arms inside unless you wanna fall out. Thank you." Not even two seconds later, the SuzaKoaster begins zooming throughout the castle. As it goes through Brene and Mihoshi's room, the two females look up at it, shrug, and get back to what they were doing. When the coaster finally comes to a stop, Koji falls out in a heap on the floor. "Nuriko. Humph." "Koji-san!" "Cye?! What're you doing in this freakish place?" "Quit acting like you don't know. It was all planed out, wasn't it? That Cye and Hope should 'accidentally' end up here? Well, I am reformulating my plans, so you came for nothing. I hope you're able to change. Cye is certainly capable," says Nuriko with a smirk. "I can assure you, Nuriko, that I had no clue Cye was going to be here. I came to look for Tasuki." Cye gapes at this. "Tasuki?! I know where he is! He's ." Nuriko glares at him and he shuts up. "How do you know Tasuki?" "I know plenty of people. Tasuki happens to run the little gang of bandits I belong to as a side job." Just then they hear a moan from Quatre's fish tank-like 'bed'. Nuriko pulls on the black sheet covering it, causing Hope and Cye to stand up very quickly. [Koji] "Hope!" [Hope] "Koji-san!" [Cye] "Hope!" [Hope] "Cye!" [Nuriko] "Quatre!" This is repeated twice, and ends when Nuriko yells, "QUIET! I created you, Quatre, and I can destroy you just as easily!" Suddenly, a gong is heard. It is Brene, from upstairs. "Master, dinner is prepared!" "Great. Owing to the present situation, formal dress is to be worn by choice."  
  
A few minutes later, the castle's occupants are sitting around a long, oak dining table. Tomo walks from place to place, pouring wine into everyone's glass. When everyone has his or her wine, Nuriko lifts his glass. "A toast. To those not here tonight." Everyone nods and drinks to this. Nuriko then clasps his hands. "And, my dear Quatre ." he picks up a black and red party hat and places it on his head. The others join in as he begins to sing: "Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Quatre, happy birthday to you." "Let's eat." As Nuriko says this, Tomo and Brene begin serving the guests. Nuriko, having been served first, starts eating immediately. Koji looks around, and then addresses Nuriko. "We came here to discuss Tasuki." "Tasuki?!" Mihoshi drops her fork in surprise. To quiet her, Nuriko opens the front of his dress a little, revealing a glowing red kanji symbol. Mihoshi says nothing more. Nuriko then turns back to Koji. "That subject's a bit tender. Anyone want another slice?" As he says this, he takes a bite of his food. Getting the insinuation, everyone but Koji and Quatre stops eating. "Er . I'm full. And I'm tired. So I'm going to bed. Ja ne, minna." With this, Mihoshi pushes her plate forward and leaves the dining room. She lets out a scream as soon as the dining room doors are closed. "He told me these people were a bit wacky," says Koji, as if in an aside, "but he didn't mention this. Aliens." At this last word he looks at Quatre, whose reply is simply "Huh?" "Koji-san?" inquires Cye. "Yes, please continue, Koji. Or should I say, Kojiri?" "What's that supposed to mean?" asks Cye defensively. "Cye, it's ok," says Koji quickly. He turns to Nuriko, giving him a hard stare.  
  
(To the tune of "Eddie") [Koji] From the day he was born/ He was . trouble./ He was the thorn/ In his miko's . side./ She tried, but damn/ He would never drop his flame- wielding fan/ He got drunk the day she left ./ From the day she was gone/ All he practiced/ Ws getting more drunk/ Each and every night/ Stealing your junk/ He was a low-down red-headed punk!/ Buddy, he was my kinda guy!!/~When Tasuki drank he really was a jackass but still he was an awesome guy/ When you needed him there, with his cool red hair/ [Nuriko] There he was/ [Hope] With a buzz/ [Koji] And a grin~/ [Mihoshi, in her room] Nur-i-ko just shoved him/ But me, I nearly loved him/ He seemed a kindred spirit/ His fan? I never feared it/ Now that Tasuki's gone there's nothing left for me ./ [Koji] But then something went wrong/ Caused by you guys/ Making him warn/ Me in a note which reads (What's it say? What's it say?)/ [Tasuki's voice] I'm surrounded by fruits/ My mind, I'm afraid I'll lose/ Oh get these fuckin' fruits a-way from me *scream*/ Chorus 2x"  
  
After this, Nuriko gets a very perturbed look on his face. Walking over to one side of the table, he yanks off the red tablecloth covering it, revealing a mutilated body. 


End file.
